It seems that whether it is remembering someone’s name or making introductions you need to be perfect when networking. However, how many times have you said someone’s name wrong or added the wrong bit of information to a moniker?
I believe if you do this with a smile you can have some fun with it. For example, if you fumble an introduction – you can smile and say “Let me start over again.” When you forget someone’s name you can say “I remember great faces but am terrible at remembering names” or “It is great to see you, what have you been up to?”
If you have just been introduced to someone and you can’t remember their name you can fess up by saying “My brain has gone into sleep mode, sorry” or “It’s on the tip of my tongue but my tongue is recharging.”
The most important thing is to maintain a sense of humor and a smile when you mix and mingle at parties this holiday season. Not only will you have more fun but you’ll be remembered because people like being around you.
Rumors start when there is a problem or something has gone wrong and no one acknowledges it. The ignoring of it allows the space for the issue to grow into the 800 pound gorilla in the room.
Even if there is nothing behind the chatter, not to address the problem makes the speculation all the louder. Eventually, all that is heard and more importantly, all that is believed, is the noise.
Rumors happen. For example- the health of Steve Jobs. It has been rumored that he is dying. Had Jobs had immediately addressed this, his health concern would still exist.
However, he could have put his right hand person out front and put a positive spin on the situation. (Most folks don’t realize that Jobs number one creative director is behind all latest and newest products at Apple, anyway.)
Problems happen. An recent example of this is Tiger Wood’s car accident over the Thanksgiving holiday. No comment from Tiger has the media and the public running rampant with rumors.
The best thing you can do when there is a problem and you are the center of it is to acknowledge and own it. When you continue to ignore the actual problem, the damage of not acknowledging it will become much greater than the actual issue itself.
The tradition when making a toast when you are the host of the party is to give it before the meal begins. The toast should welcome everyone and give a few words about the occasion. If you are going to use humor, do in good taste. This toast should not be a roast. The best toasts are genuine, with a smile and confidence.
If you are the guest you should wait after the host has made his or her toast. If he or she has not done so by the time the meal is serve, you as the guest, can make your toast thanking the host or hostess before everyone begins to eat.
Raising the glass has become a custom when making toasts, although it is not necessary for all of the guests to raise their glasses at the same time. It is also not necessary for you to stand unless you are a table and it will make it easier for folks to hear and see you. Do not tap the glass to get attention unless it is necessary for a large and energetic group. Otherwise raising the glass standing up or sitting down should get everyone’s attention.
So remember when you make a toast, do it with a smile and be sincere and when you do you will show grace and elegance.
USA Today once reported most communication problems come from e-mail exchanges. Here are a few thoughts to be sure your image is where it needs to be and the message you send expresses your true intent.
If you are sending a long message I recommend not using a mobile hand held like a blackberry. Your lap top is better. It’s easier to check each word.
Always assume that everyone in America (make that the world) will read your message. Every time someone gets in trouble it seems like there’s always a deleted email to support it!
Use spell check!
Most of the current electronic hand held tools have spell check. If you don’t have spell check, mention that in your email. In fact, you might even ask for misspelling pre-forgiveness.
Always read your e-mails twice before you send them. If you’re angry, save your message and put it in the draft folder. Re-read it the next day. It may not seem as appropriate then.
E-mail keeps you in touch quicker and faster than snail mail. It’s also an easy documentation tool. But remember, it has the potential to bruise your image.
It is amazing to me that folks we meet who are not always the best looking or may not wear the best clothes can project something we just like. It is their smile, their body language or the way they make you the center of their universe?
I always think of Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends & Influence People” or Tony Alessandra’s “Charisma”. It’s the eye contact, enthusiastic speech, staying in the moment, sincere smile and expressive body language. If all of that shows you are interested in a person that’s all that matters.
A good friend and client had the opportunity to meet Bill Clinton. She couldn’t get over how when he talks to someone it really feels he’s sincerely interested in only them.
I know Bill has the looks. But how many times have you met a beautiful woman or handsome man who made you feel uncomfortable instead of good.
The bottom line suggests that looks are not everything. It is really about being interested in another person and using your body language, the sound of your voice and your facial expressions to show it. This trumps good looks.
So, there is hope for us who don’t look like the celebrities of the world.
Non-pleated front slacks have become very popular. The question that arises is who should wear these slacks? And should they be cuffed?
Non–pleated front slacks have always been the usual look for jeans and casual twill slacks. Recently, they became vogue in suits for the younger man. For example, with a black suit, the no pleat style slack works with an athletically cut jacket.
Over the last five years the non-pleat slack has been tailored with a fuller leg. This allows a cuff. In the traditional no-pleat slack, the leg was slimmer with a no cuff hem.
So, should the younger man wear them and the older man not? Not necessarily. It depends how the pants fit. The no-pleat front slack is best worn by someone who has a flat stomach and slender legs. Age doesn’t matter.
The slender bodied older man may look quite sharp with non-pleat front slacks worn with a sport jacket.
The well proportioned younger man may end up wearing a pleated slack and look just as smart. Also, designers have become savvy by pairing the pleated slack with an athletically cut jacket.
So the bottom line – men wear what best fits your body type.
In a professional setting is a hug appropriate? Or is just appropriate at holiday parties?
Generally speaking, the only time you can to touch someone in a business setting is when you shake hands. However, what happens if someone wants to hug you or the urge to hug strikes you?
Female to female or male to male is not usually a problem. Even then, hug with caution. To be on the safe side, don’t initiate a hug unless you have a long term relationship with the “huggee”, and it’s been a custom for the two of you.
In a male/female situation, as a male I do not recommend initiating a hug. If a woman hugs you it’s fine to reciprocate. Remember, in a business setting it’s one hug—gentle and brief.
If you’re at a holiday party where alcohol is served, hug with caution. Many a career has been ruined because of a hug that became more of a hugggggg.
No tight squeezing, please!
Recent research by Dr. Richard Perry of Ohio State University and a team of psychologists has suggested that an upright posture affects how others see you and how you see yourself. The study consisted of two groups. The ones who sat up straight experienced more confidence than those who sat in a slumped position.
Studies have also shown that when you smile, even if you are not particularly happy, good feelings begin to flow.
So, the next time you are walking down the hall, walk straight with a smile on your face. Those around you will perceive you as being more confident.
Half the battle is having those around you feel more confident about you. When they are, it gives you more opportunities to showcase yourself and to possibly expand the horizons of your professional life.
In watching Michael Jackson’s “This is it”, I was especially fascinated by his stylists and designers use of Swarovski crystals and sequins. I loved Michael’s gold crystal pants.
This brings to mind the growing use of jewels to accessorize day wear such as tee shirts, jackets and pants.
Glittery adornments have traditionally been worn in the evening or by performers. Not any more. So, the question arises—when is sparkle appropriate?
The general rule for a professional environment still holds. Save your sparkles for the evening and holiday events. The one exception would be those who work in creative or entertainment fields. To them, I say go for it!
Color also makes a difference – neutral colors like black, white and topaz create an elegant look for sparkles and sequins. The jewel colors- red, gold and purple- will always have a festive look to them.
Finally, if you want to have some flair but you’re uncertain as to how much, you can wear a scarf with a bit of sparkle.
Hand grooming is critical to projecting a professional image. Torn cuticles and ragged nails are unacceptable. Does this mean that your nails always have to look manicured? This question comes up time and time again.
Some people never have cuticles that grow. These folks just need to be sure their nails are clean and filed. They can manage this grooming themselves.
Whether your cuticles tend to be dry and unsightly or you want to prevent any nail issues, a bi-monthly manicure is a good way to ensure your hands look their best.
Men should keep the nails short and filed semi round.
Women can finish their nails rounded or semi square.
Nail polish also reflects personal taste. If men choose to polish they need to go for a non shiny look. For women a neutral color is best.
However, if you’re in the arts or a creative field, you can add some flair.
Your nails speak louder than you think when they are not well groomed.
