“Don’t be afraid to go for positions, jobs or take on clients just outside of your knowledge base. Confidence is overrated. It is when we most uncomfortable and looking for answers that we learn and grow the most.” Barbara Corocoran

Confidence is built by doing. The more you practice, the better you will get. I recently worked with a young, very smart CPA who practiced a presentation about the nuances of cultural differences between English speaking and non-English speaking folks. This also happened to be her first time speaking to a client group.

She did the hard work by practicing with me then did a dry run in her office. Not only did she ended up hitting a home run with the client, the Senior Vice President has asked her to speak at a regional conference!

I am probably going to date myself but hot pants with boots were the rage in the 70’s. Are they back? Hot pants featured fabric just two to three inches below the crotch. Today’s young and not so young women are wearing shorts that have no more than an inch of fabric covering their butts. It is not a pretty sight.

In fact, it’s totally inappropriate for business. A young woman was even fired for wearing these very short shorts. She was upset that there was not a dress policy addressing how short these pants should be. (Funny that young men are wearing shorts that hit their knees and hang way too long)

This is one reason why people in other countries see Americans as sloppy.

You may have heard the expression “musical chairs”… well, I have a new one “musical times”. This refers to individuals who continually move times and days for appointments because their schedules constantly change. In addition, folks who do this, never seem to arrive at the designated appointment times anyway.

This is the number one career killer in my mind. Being on time is being respectful and professional. Years ago, I was coaching with a number of account managers. While waiting in the executive dining room for the client, the hostess said while the clients were always on time, it was the managers who were always late.

When you are late, it sends a message your time is more important than the person you are meeting. Recently, I worked with coaching client who was always on time for scheduled appointments. I let her know how impressive it was and that it showed true leadership skills. The client told me that her staff and boss complimented her on it also.

Being on time sends a message you are managing your time effectively which is a the sign of a true professional.

Conference calls are a way of life in business, especially when dealing with global partners. Currently, many of my clients have clients who are not English speaking. We have developed a list of key points for English speaking folks to use when talking with those for whom English is not the native language, always:

1. Speak slowly.

2. Ask if he/she is the person handling this project.

3. Display patience on the conference call.

4. Repeat if there is silence after a question. (You may not have been understood.)

5. Be formal.

6. Use simple words.

7. Suggest you are following up instead of saying “We did not receive the papers.”

If possible, try to have at least one face to face meeting to get to know overseas clients. Establishing relationships is a very important lubricator for smooth business dealings, especially in the Asian culture.

Since their introduction, leggings have now grown into a staple for most women. Most pants, from jeans to dress pants, have gone slim and skinny. And if you look at what women are wearing today, probably almost 90% wear leggings to slim and skinny pants. The latest fashion craze taking hold is patterned leggings.

I understand patterned leggings with the right coordinated top can be a fun look for the gym and running. However, I do not feel they are appropriate for business casual or casual day at work.

Recently, I was with a client and her staff. The question came up about professional dress: Is it a requirement to wear a tie or can a sport jacket or suit be acceptable without a tie? Sometimes, clients are dressed without a jacket but always in a shirt and tie. What should they wear to always be acceptable and not under or overdressed?

In a first time meeting, always wear a full suit with a tie. If it is a very casual environment, a gray suit or a navy blazer with gray dress slacks can be worn instead. When making a first time presentation, it is suggested to always wear a blazer in very casual settings without a tie. You can always remove your tie or take off your jacket if the environment is very casual.

Walking in the first time in full dress sets the stage that you are the expert. It is more difficult to appear to be the professional if you come in with just a shirt and dress slacks because jackets always project the leader and subject matter expert look.

1. Not having several personal introductions

2. Not having an ice breaker to start the conversation

3. Not having a business card

4. Not mixing with more than one group (or staying too long in conversation with one group)

5. Not listening enough (non-stop talking)

6. Not asking how, when and why questions

7. Not having a good time (projecting a look that reflects stomach pain might be occurring)

8. Not smiling (instead, wearing a more a grim facial expression)

9. Not making eye contact or looking around the room more than at a conversation partner

10. Not having a crisp handshake

Take away the nots and you can be a star at networking. The process will also become more fun.

One of the perks of long term client relationships is that I sometimes end up working with members of client business teams and even with their family. Recently, I was asked to work with a young man who was a grandson of a client (I worked more than 15 years with my client and her staff.).

Andy is quite talented in writing stories and wonderful artist. However, he is shy, could not look people in the eyes, looked down and had a half-limp handshake. To draw Andy out, I first asked about his art. Then, I requested that he show me some of his written work on his I Pad. I also used a few improv exercises to help him have fun when speaking with confidence. I noticed that he loved his dogs so I suggested that he think about them when he gets nervous.

In the book, Outliers, Malcom Gladwell writes about folks like Andy who have talent at very young age, and who keep working and developing to eventually be quite successful. Now, Andy has a head start in being able to communicate about his work. I believe he will be a very successful writer.

Can you imagine an eleven year old writing nonfiction books using animals as characters? How special is that?

One of my clients is a Senior Vice President in a progressive organization. For example, women can skip the hose and wear sleeveless tops and dresses. She wears 3 inch heels. The reasons it does not matter for her is one, the culture and secondly her clothing choices are tailored so that the heels are not even noticeable.

However, in very conservative organization, that may be a problem as well wearing clothing choices that appear too trendy. It might lack the professionalism you want.

Fortunately, there are many shoe choices that offer a smart look without three-inch heels. Stuart Weisman has a great kitty heel pump that is classic and rich looking without sacrificing comfort or needing to make trips to a podiatrist later on.

How many times have you run out for a short errand in a busy area while not wearing your best? Maybe you’ve got clothes on that are usually worn when cleaning a garage or washing a car? Of course, then, you always run in someone you know. This has happened to me and I have always regretted it.

Now, what I do if I am going to run out in not too great looking clothing is that I put at least a bit of color on my lips and make my hair presentable. I do not want to be mistaken for a bag lady. I figure that when they see my face then maybe my poor clothing choices won’t be noticed!