I just finished watching Roger Love onYouTube talking about how to eliminate “ahs and ums” when speaking. These fillers become annoying and distract the listener. My thoughts have always been to stop and breathe. Saying nothing is better than a constant stream of fillers.

These are Roger‘s recommendations:

• Use full sentences.

• Connect your words together.

• Only stop for commons and periods.

• Do not make a sound between sentences.

Honesty is the best policy to a certain point. We want to be able to trust each other in the work place but at the same time, white lies are almost a necessity.

Kenneth Murnighnan, a professor of risk management at Northwestern University was quoted in the Chicago Tribune article “Honesty also best policy” by Rex Huppke. Dr. Murnighnan says the workplace needs employees with enough “social graces” to tell white lies when necessary. He even suggests that leaders and managers want white lies. “Sometimes white lies are really helpful because they prevent people from stirring up trouble you don’t need.”

However, make sure you know when the truth is needed. Often, employees hit a wall in their professional career and are not promoted because they were not given a dose of reality early on. A good leader will be honest with employees about where they need to strengthen their soft skills and hopefully provide the tools and support to help them grow.

Honesty when appropriate is the best policy.

My father’s strong suit was never business but he had remarkable people skills. When he walked into a room, strangers would instantly be drawn to him. A true people person, my father, Suey, remembered names, family stories and some detail he could use to start a personal conversation.

Being a sole proprietor can be a lonely existence sometimes. He compensated for this by being active in the Rotary, American Legion, Kiwanis and in the Chinese-American Community.

These are the critical people skills that I learned from this wonderful man:

– Always be the first to greet someone, never wait for him/her to come to you.

– Establish eye contact instantly.

– Never be stingy with smiles. Make them great and flash them often.

– Always repeat a name. This helps ensure it’s pronounced correctly and that it stays in memory.

– Take on responsibilities in organizations. It’s a great way to meet folks and become engaged.

Today, when I am in a room full of strangers and especially when I am going to present, I try and introduce myself to as many people as possible.

When I greet someone, I remember my father because it brings a smile to my face which helps me be fully present with that person.

The dress is slowly replacing the suit with a skirt as a power look. Wearing a jacket with the sleeveless dress can add a splash of color to a neutral tone dress. Color blocking has also become very popular and is perfect for the neutral tone dress.

What are some of the key elements of a power dress?

• When a dress fits properly at the shoulders and hips it projects elegance. The weight of the fabric is critical so it hangs correctly and moves well with the body.

• The color of the dress must enhance your skin tone. This is especially true if the neckline is close to your face.

• Solid colors always exude a classic, rich look.

• Two color prints in geometric shapes have been replacing the solid color dress.

Eye contact is always important in these situations:

• When first meeting a person, good eye contact gives an instant connection. In some cases it is how you will be remembered.

• When you are presenting, eye contact helps you engage each member of the audience. Even if you cannot see them, they can see you.

• When you are having a very intense conversation, whether sad or happy, the impact of it will be felt with serious eye contact.

Do’s

• Do wear a name tag on your left side. The reason for this is so when the person shakes your hand they can easily read your name.

• Say your name when shaking hands to help the person remember it.

• If the name tag is on a string or lanyard, wear it chest high so it’s easy to see.

Don’ts

• Don’t wear it so it sits at the middle of your stomach or below.

• Don’t put it in your pocket so no one can see it.

I have always believed that nails look more professional with color polish. However, nails can be made to look worse even with nail polish, if the cuticles are unattractive.

My nails have always been a challenge because I have very dry and unattractive cuticles that are continually aggravated by nail polish. So, I have gone cold turkey and started getting manicures without nail color.

That being said, your hands and nails must look well taken care of. They must enhance your overall professional impact. This also means that you probably need to stay away from distracting polish colors and designs.

Remember, though, that if you go decide to go without nail polish entirely, you must stay vigilant in keeping your nails clean because polish hides the dirt that accumulates underneath them.

I remember how I use to dislike having to wear a name badge. Now, years later, the name tag has become a must in networking sessions because it helps me remember someone’s name.

However, at a recent event, while each of us wrote our names on the tags, probably 90% of the names were difficult to read!

When writing your name on a name badge, print your first name only (and maybe the first initial of your last name) using large letters. That’s because most name tags are not large enough to print your first and last name. You can always share your last name at the appropriate time.

I recently attended an awards ceremony where a number of women received recognition for their business and good citizen’s achievements. Each was featured in the program. I felt it was surprising when each of them went up to receive their awards because only a few looked like their photos. Some had aged significantly or their physical shapes had taken on another life either up or down. Now granted, some folks don’t change, but clothing styles do as does how one poses for a head shot. These are some tips to insure your photo is current.

A photo:

• Should not be more than four years old

• Should be replaced if your hair coloring or style changes drastically (like from a blond to a red head)

• Should be updated if you gain or lose more than 20 pounds

You always want to look like you just stepped out of your photo when someone first meets you.

In today’s world of social media sites like Facebook, LinkedIn and Spoke to name a few, your photo should be appropriate to the site. LinkedIn and Spoke are business networking sites while Facebook is a social one unless you have a professional page like I do. My photo on Linkedin is not the same one I use on my personal Facebook page. My photo on Amazon as an author is also different.

The life of your photograph is best served with different clothing choices and in some cases even a different pose. The reason for this is that your audience is usually different for each site. The purpose of your photo is to connect to the viewer and give them a sense about you. So, wearing a very casual outfit will be fine for your personal Facebook page but not for your LinkedIn profile.