A number of years ago I had a meeting with a Senior Vice-President of a large company. He arranged for me to meet his VP who I would be coaching. The VP was a Guatemalan. In his culture, personal space is nose to nose unlike in the US where one arm’s length is the accepted norm. I did not step back from him because I knew this. The fact that I understood his background was important to him and I ended up working for his group over a period of ten years before he retired.
Here are some tips about personal space:
• In the US, one arm’s length is the norm and the only time you touch someone is during the handshake.
• In Spain, people tend to stand much closer together. They also touch each other more frequently than do their US counterparts. Trying to create personal space is viewed as shyness or rudeness.
• On the other hand, Australians require extra personal space—at minimum of an arm’s length or more is typical.
How you sound is as important as the words you chose, especially in different venues.
Your voice sound and pitch needs to be different when you are:
*In front of a live audience with a microphone
*In front of a live audience without a microphone
*Presenting a webinar using a headset
If you can, record yourself. Then assess what you hear when listening to the tapes. I have a Sony audio recorder that I use to help me ensure my voice and pitch engages the audience and conveys passion in the topic.
Nail polish has replaced the lipstick women bought when they felt they needed a pick-me-up. Your nail color can complete the total look.
The first lady, Michelle Obama, recently wore the nail color gray. What I love about this color is that it is one of the new opaque colors. It modifies the very fashionable colors to more conservative neutrals. One of my favorite brands is OPI in nail polish. It has wide range of colors—neutrals to the vamp black shades.
The trend for new bold colors began about five years ago when some young women wore candy colors. Then we moved into the very dark colors with shorter, square shaped nails. The first lady bridged her color choice by keeping her nails a bit longer and not squaring them off. It looked perfect and smart.
Skirts and dresses are coming back in full style force. In the Sunday NYT times, the article about tech women showed that the basic skirts are moderately above the knee.
Recently, in the city, the skirts look to be on the rise, hemming at least five inches about the knee. This is pushing the guidelines. However, if tights or colored stockings with a seamless look are worn, then the skirt can work.
To be on the safe and elegant side, a skirt ending right above the knees is the appropriate length.
A new suit, pair of glasses or a hair style can be a game changer in building your confidence. Here’s an example. Years ago, I was interviewing a client who was referred to me. My role was to help strengthen both her presence and communication style. (I found out later that she was about to be terminated prior to coming to me.)
I spoke with her later after she had become a top producer in her industry. I asked her what made the difference to senior management during her interview years ago. She said the change in her presence and communication style (her new image) gave senior management at the time a reason to allow her to do her thing because she all of a sudden exuded confidence.
Just recently I was completely surprised and completely caught off guard when given an award. In cases like this often, you hear folks either ramble on and on or go completely blank.
These are the keys to saying a few brief but impactful comments:
1. Take the time to walk up to the stage. This gives you an opportunity to collect your thoughts.
2. Share a story or a fact that will honor the award. For example, you might mention how the organization impacted you.
3. Give thanks to those responsible for you receiving the honor.
Remember these critical elements and you will always give a heartfelt, appreciative and graceful speech.
Often, women make the mistake of either defining or not defining their eyebrows. This has been the subject of some of my blog postings. Just recently, I was involved in a program providing one on one counsel for high potential women. The second most discussed topic was the appropriate shape and color of eyebrows.
For men it was completely different. Most men had thick eyebrows. I noticed that the thicker the eyebrow the more one became engaged and listened to these folks.
Also, look at some celebrities. For example, Chris Pine (he was recently in in This Means War) has these amazing eyebrows. They draw you in as he speaks. So, take a look at your eyebrows. Do they capture your eyes so folks are drawn in to listen to every word you say or not?
The new emphasis today for management is to find individuals who are passionate about their work. This really has always been true. In fact, you can tell the person who is passionate about their work and commitment to high standards. It comes natural to them. They are always looking for ways to innovate.
I know that the job market is tough. And getting promoted within companies has become even tougher because of competition. This is why it is important to find the right professional fit. You want to release your passion so your job does not become work.
How do you determine what creates the passion for you? Begin with two columns on paper. In one, write down every time you do something that resonates with you (brings you joy). In the other column log the things you do that you don’t like.
Maintain this log for awhile. You will see as you begin to review it over time that it will clearly show what you are passionate about.
A smart break in a pant leg both for women and men depends on two things: the person’s height and whether they are in a conservative or in a fashion forward environment. The break will also insure the length of the pants is not too short or too long.
In many of the magazines you will see men wearing pants where the legs puddle around the shoe. This is a fashion statement, not the traditional way to wear the slack.
For women, the trend is a light break. You can determine this with your tailor. If you are not sure if it is the right length, walk a few steps. If you see the pant waving without brushing the shoe it is too short. The right break in a pair of pants will always have the wearer appearing elegant and polished.
Flips flops are career killers besides being feet killers. I was in the city and 80%, if not more, of the folks I saw were wearing flips flops or some version of them. Then there are the toes. Do you really want those around you to see your toes?
I hope that most of the folks I saw have another pair of shoes they wear in the office. Remember the beach, picnics and the around the house are where flip flops belong, not in the office.
Do you really want to be supporting podiatrists?