The cooking competition show is about more than just the food. It provides a visual of ways contestants and judges work under pressure to deliver successful products and give constructive feedback. The show that continues to give feedback gems is the Kid’s Championship Baking Show.

Duff and Valerie are the judges and it is the way they use the three to one rule that clicks. They look for the three positives and one not-so-positive area to help the contestants achieve success as a baker. The judges balance the fine line on these impressionable young minds. We understand they were chosen for their baking skills, personality, and how they receive feedback.
All us of revert to the child in ourselves when under review and feeling pressured. (Even when we try to toughen up!)

Simon Sinek suggested that “Learning has greater value when we share what we learned”. Sharing learnings creates value for the person delivering and for the receiver (s). However, sometimes, people forget about the importance of the way and when the learnings are delivered.

When this information is given at a time a mistake has been made, it will look like a correction. The best time is to discuss in a sharing environment. The point I bring up to my clients and in workshops is to share what we have recently experienced that continues to help us learn.

Social media has a life of its own. It is worse than gossip and can haunt those who traffic in it and anyone around them. Facebook and Twitter are platforms to express news and instant emotional reactions, good and bad.
People have even gotten fired for being caught up in loose comments made in the news by high powered folks. They thought if it was ok by those folks, then they could say it too. However, the reality is that some have power and freedom without repercussions and others face the wrath. If something is that important for you to express it in writing, write the words to yourself first and decide the way you want to handle it the next day.

Many companies go through changes which may mean laid off co-workers or staff with changed assignments which can leave long-term team members anxious. The best thing to do is to wish them well. Let them know how much you have enjoyed working together and if you are close to the person, give contact permission. Always maintain a positive dialog. Someday, it could be you who is affected by company changes.

Recently, a politician attempted to rationalize the lack of a decision on a certain issue concerning a policy that the powers (White House) made. The way it was being explained was so terrible that the audience, including me and all the news media, both conservatives and liberals, did not believe it. His explantion made no sense. This lesson is this: First, make your point, second, explain the details and finally, reconfirm the point.

There are folks in this world who like to throw you off with the “gotcha” question or comment. It comes out of the blue and the purpose is to show power. The way to protect yourself is to ask questions to help you get grounded without sounding defensive.

A gotcha moment happened to me recently and I was totally unprepared. Now, I would begin the conversation by asking the question – can you clarify this for me? This would have not only have helped me stay grounded but it would have added balance to the discussion. Putting this tool in place creates a win for you as well as a strong show of confidence.

In Adam Bryant’s new book “Quick and Nimble”, he uses anecdotes and strategies gathered from American CEO’s about how they help managers get better by teaching them how to be good coaches. Good coaches give honest feedback and help those who they coach create a vision so they can grow.

One challenge for managers is giving honest feedback in an inclusive manner. Using the three to one rule is critical. In this type of feedback, talk about three skills they do well along with one area they might want to strengthen and why. In the book, what most coaching CEO’s then did was to occasionally check back to offer support because change is difficult but it can be achieved with consistent support.