Truth will always matter. Once, during a television makeover show twenty years ago, the host asked me what I would never do. I replied that I would never lie to a client or audience. Truth can be told in a way that is not hurtful. For example, instead of saying that the suit looks awful, one might say it does not do the person justice.

In the second season of the television series, “The Sinner”, a young boy decides not to run away. He chose to face the consequences because lies eat away at integrity. And a very good friend and outstanding psychologist said, once integrity is gone, there is nothing left. Being truthful is not always easy but it is the right thing to do.

The cooking competition show is about more than just the food. It provides a visual of ways contestants and judges work under pressure to deliver successful products and give constructive feedback. The show that continues to give feedback gems is the Kid’s Championship Baking Show.

Duff and Valerie are the judges and it is the way they use the three to one rule that clicks. They look for the three positives and one not-so-positive area to help the contestants achieve success as a baker. The judges balance the fine line on these impressionable young minds. We understand they were chosen for their baking skills, personality, and how they receive feedback.
All us of revert to the child in ourselves when under review and feeling pressured. (Even when we try to toughen up!)

Holding a grudge really hurts the wronged person not the person responsible for the problem. It is not easy to let go of a grudge. However, it is tough to take the high road and rise above the it, especially when you feel hurt.

If you can get past it, though, the rewards are tremendous! Besides the respect of peers and leaders, you will love yourself more. Being wronged will happen many more times in life. And remember, it has been medically proven that folks who let go of hurts live longer and happier lives.

Today, more than ever in the professional and personal world:

1. Speak truth not fiction
2. Admit a mistake by saying “I was wrong” and giving an apology
3. Only say nice things or avoid saying anything
4. Be on time for meetings or conference calls
5. Answer emails within 24 hours

When finding a solution to a problem or making a critical decision, think of the long-term impact. When I was in sales, helping folks determine the next step in a purchase, I knew they needed to answer how the decision would affect them in a year. This is a question I always ask myself and my clients when they are struggling or just taking the next step.

Giving someone a second chance is critical for long term survival and success. Mistakes and not so smart decisions happen to everyone. What matters is how we recover by giving others and ourselves a second chance. The folks who continue to dwell on their mistakes and wrongs done by others will never reach their full potential. It is good to learn from our mistakes and then let them go by allowing and embracing a second chance.

Leaders show up acting like leaders and project a sense of authority not intimidation. This is a prime trait of successful leaders I have worked with. They are not all in the C-Suite or even necessarily want to be there, but the true leader, no matter what the title, is respected within and outside of their communities.

• Posture – stands straight

• Walk – moves confidently – nor rushed or hesitant

• Facial expression – flashes an easy smile

• Clothing – fits with ease

• Integrity – projects honesty

• Communication – speaks with authority

• Kind – treats everyone with respect

Walking into a room feeling good sets the tone for the rest of not only the event, but the remainder of the day. Remember, the first  impression of the day is the one you set for yourself. As author, Malcom Gladwell, suggested, “The first impression is a self-fulfilling prophecy.”

If you feel confident, those around you will too. Good fit and the right color of clothing choices are critical to feeling good about yourself. The correct clothing formula strengthens your comfort, well-being, and self-confidence to own the room you walk into!

In everyday communications, when there is no conflict, leading by example is easy. It is when conflicts arise and extreme differences of opinion emerge, that a true leader takes charge by example while taking the high road:

The No’s
No name calling
No assigning blames
No screaming or shouting
No using social media to air out differences

The Do’s
Do stay calm
Do take a breath and think before speaking
Do listen before speaking
Do ask about solutions
Do bring in support for both sides of the discussion

A tailor is a best friend in ensuring the right fit in hem lengths, around the waist and the for the width of a jacket sleeve. The right fit takes pounds off a person and the wrong fit does the opposite. The wrong fit also projects the clothing in a frumpy, dated way, no matter how expensive the item.