My father’s strong suit was never business but he had remarkable people skills. When he walked into a room, strangers would instantly be drawn to him. A true people person, my father, Suey, remembered names, family stories and some detail he could use to start a personal conversation.

Being a sole proprietor can be a lonely existence sometimes. He compensated for this by being active in the Rotary, American Legion, Kiwanis and in the Chinese-American Community.

These are the critical people skills that I learned from this wonderful man:

– Always be the first to greet someone, never wait for him/her to come to you.

– Establish eye contact instantly.

– Never be stingy with smiles. Make them great and flash them often.

– Always repeat a name. This helps ensure it’s pronounced correctly and that it stays in memory.

– Take on responsibilities in organizations. It’s a great way to meet folks and become engaged.

Today, when I am in a room full of strangers and especially when I am going to present, I try and introduce myself to as many people as possible.

When I greet someone, I remember my father because it brings a smile to my face which helps me be fully present with that person.

Eye contact is always important in these situations:

• When first meeting a person, good eye contact gives an instant connection. In some cases it is how you will be remembered.

• When you are presenting, eye contact helps you engage each member of the audience. Even if you cannot see them, they can see you.

• When you are having a very intense conversation, whether sad or happy, the impact of it will be felt with serious eye contact.

Do’s

• Do wear a name tag on your left side. The reason for this is so when the person shakes your hand they can easily read your name.

• Say your name when shaking hands to help the person remember it.

• If the name tag is on a string or lanyard, wear it chest high so it’s easy to see.

Don’ts

• Don’t wear it so it sits at the middle of your stomach or below.

• Don’t put it in your pocket so no one can see it.

I remember how I use to dislike having to wear a name badge. Now, years later, the name tag has become a must in networking sessions because it helps me remember someone’s name.

However, at a recent event, while each of us wrote our names on the tags, probably 90% of the names were difficult to read!

When writing your name on a name badge, print your first name only (and maybe the first initial of your last name) using large letters. That’s because most name tags are not large enough to print your first and last name. You can always share your last name at the appropriate time.

I recently attended an awards ceremony where a number of women received recognition for their business and good citizen’s achievements. Each was featured in the program. I felt it was surprising when each of them went up to receive their awards because only a few looked like their photos. Some had aged significantly or their physical shapes had taken on another life either up or down. Now granted, some folks don’t change, but clothing styles do as does how one poses for a head shot. These are some tips to insure your photo is current.

A photo:

• Should not be more than four years old

• Should be replaced if your hair coloring or style changes drastically (like from a blond to a red head)

• Should be updated if you gain or lose more than 20 pounds

You always want to look like you just stepped out of your photo when someone first meets you.

In today’s world of social media sites like Facebook, LinkedIn and Spoke to name a few, your photo should be appropriate to the site. LinkedIn and Spoke are business networking sites while Facebook is a social one unless you have a professional page like I do. My photo on Linkedin is not the same one I use on my personal Facebook page. My photo on Amazon as an author is also different.

The life of your photograph is best served with different clothing choices and in some cases even a different pose. The reason for this is that your audience is usually different for each site. The purpose of your photo is to connect to the viewer and give them a sense about you. So, wearing a very casual outfit will be fine for your personal Facebook page but not for your LinkedIn profile.

If someone has asked not to have you assigned to them, it is best to go along with it. However, some think that finding out what your detractors say is critical to professional growth. If that’s the case in your situation, ask your manager to find out what the issue is and share the feedback with you.

You can also address the issue yourself but that can be a little tricky. You have to go into it with a very open, non-threatening, non-judgmental spirit. And even then, the person may not want to speak with you face to face about it.

Folks assigned to work on teams may not always be a good fit. An example of this is dealing with a team member who has a reputation of not working well with others. There are two ways to handle it. (Use the method that best suits the culture of your organization.)

One way is for the team leader to have a one on one conversation with this individual about shared expectations and what is the best for the team and organization. The second way is to have a team meeting with an open dialog on the key elements of impactful communications. Outline acceptable methods of how to handle any potential conflict and decide on the best way to agree to disagree.

The most important thing is ensure the team is successful as a group.

When Samantha takes a walk, she always starts full of the potential excitement of her adventure. Her head is held high and her gaze is straight ahead, eyes shining with great anticipation about what she might see. For those of you who know, Samantha is my bison (you can see her picture on the far upper right corner).

Wouldn’t it be great if each time you walked into a room, you had the good anticipatory feeling of exploring something new? It projects in your body, facial expressions and even your walk. It is the aura of confidence and creates a wonderful first impression.

The charm of Facebook is that it helps folks express themselves and engage those with like minds. It can also provide some self-insight:

Dos

• Talk about only positive experiences

• Select profile photos that have a professional, casual, friendly look

• Post pictures that involve others only if you have permission to use them

Don’ts

• Never write anything off-color

• Never post any pictures that are risqué

• Never say anything negative about a product or person

You always want to present positive vibes because what you post has a long internet life. Following these few simple guidelines will help ensure that your Facebook posts will only enhance your image.