Recently the world has been hit with major tragedies. Situations arose where we have been indirectly in contact with those directly affected. It’s important to actively listen and offer sympathy with a simple “I am sorry”. Offering commentary on the event is best kept to yourself unless you have faced a similar situation. Active listening offers much more than event analysis to the person in pain.

The 2016 presidential election campaign is like none we have seen before, and the challenges associated with avoiding conversations which can alienate colleagues, bosses, and customers are greater than ever. Innocent ice-breakers under the most informal of circumstances can turn passionate. Given the state of polarized feelings on political topics, it might be best to plan in advance just how far you are willing to go in stating your preferences, and how, exactly, you should express them. Restraint might be your best default. Conveying an attitude of open-mindedness can temper the decibel level.

Connect with the interviewer – do your research on the company, position, and industry. Know their competition, their strengths and what make their employees happy. This helps you generate impactful questions, letting the interviewer know you understand their opportunities and challenges.

Be able to talk about yourself – prevent an interrogation by the interviewer. Practice talking about yourself with a friend. Video a mock interview of yourself to see how you can strengthen your presence. When you do, be prepared to see a different person on the video than the one you think you are.

Be memorable – follow up professionally even if you are not offered the position. You got your foot in the door this time. Make sure they think of you next time.

Improv is about making the person next to you look good. I took a year of Improv at Second City in Chicago to help me be a better speaker. It also helped me design some experiential programs for speaking to audiences about personal branding and interpersonal skills. Improv helps in networking where thinking on your feet is useful because it encourages you to begin a conversation that is inclusive and not intrusive. Improv recently was featured in the New York Times business section on how team Improv can build creativity in thinking.

“Figure Out the Things You Don’t Know” came out of a recent interview with Drew Houston, the CEO of Dropbox. That resonated with me because I am in the process of completing a course that teaches a coaching approach that ensures the client will always walk away with a solution to an issue.

The course is a six-month program for 2.5 hours a week. The main purpose for me was to start working toward a master certification with ICF (International Coaching Federation). Going in, I thought if I also learned something new, that would be terrific. However, since I have been coaching clients for more than 20 years, my expectations were low.

How wrong I was! The new learnings have been instrumental in helping me help my clients succeed. I had been so busy with work I fell behind in taking new courses which I used to take at the rate of at least six programs a year. This was an eye opening experience. My recommendation is take a course or program to further your professional or personal life. It just might enrich you!

Often, after a program, an audience member will come up to ask for my card because they would like to know more about how I can help them or their organization.  I follow up with an e-mail or a call but often do not get a response even after a few tries. Maybe they are traveling or been hit by a car? The reality is that sometimes people are not really serious or life gets in their way.

My rule of thumb is to follow up immediately for a month then I do it monthly for a few months. I eventually call or email, letting them know they can contact me if they would like to meet or talk about personal or organizational needs. Then, I put their information into a file for future business. Even if those comments are just a polite gesture and not a serious request, you always want to follow-up because it is a good business practice.

Using the words “but or however” throws up a wall that creates an adverse reaction because they tend to negate the verbiage said prior. In a recent Marshall Goldsmith Thinkers50 Video Blog,  Marshall  discusses the negative impact of saying but or however. In fact, just today, in providing feedback to a client, I caught myself using but and however without realizing it. Beware of the negative impact of these two words and work on replacing them.

There have been many books and articles about what makes a great speaker. Politicians, especially during an election year, are great examples of passion versus script. The folks that get up in front of you who truly believe in what they are speaking about, bring us into their world. We feel their commitment and beliefs. The folks who are scripted never really hook us into their ideas. They may have more substance and experience but unfortunately, they may struggle to attract followers or win elections by relying solely on script instead of passion.

In the movie, Joy Luck Club, one of the Asian daughters loses her identity because she tries to assimilate herself into her new husband’s family and lifestyle. In doing so, she loses her own identity. I use this story with clients who might be in difficult business relationships with company stakeholders. They try to reach the finish line with work but the line keeps moving. These individuals take pride in their ability to deliver expectations but continually find themselves in situations where they cannot. They keep doing more but more gets piled on them because the finish line keeps changing. The folks who survive by pushing back in an intrusive environment are ones who know their own worth. So, when you can put a stake in the ground by letting people know what you are worth, you not only get yourself back but you receive the respect of others.

How many times have you been in meeting and notice that the person you are speaking with completely changes facial expression and body language? This signals that the person is not on the same page with you. What should you do if this happens?

Asking a question to reengage the person is critical. The question must have elements that will bring the person back to the conversation. Never intrusive always inclusive, and if appropriate, a why, how or what question. Pay attention to their facial expression and body language to make sure you are getting their attention. Wait for the answer.