You may have heard the saying: It’s not what you know, it is who knows you. I believe the new mantra is just who knows you.

Often, when a job opening is posted the hiring powers may already have someone in mind. This person is the one they know about including what they stand for, their personal brand and work history of success.

So, I ask— Who knows you and how do you network to increase the number of people that do?

There are at least five vehicles of networking:

• Formal events once or twice a month

• Informal, meaning casual by chance, in the hallway, parking lot, the elevator, etc.

• Social Media such as LinkedIn, Facebook and Spoke to name a few

• Being published

• Having a leadership role in an industry or work-based organization

You must have your personal introduction and interesting areas of conversation to share at a formal networking event and be involved in three of the above five networking vehicles. Otherwise, no will know who you are.

In this fast paced world, e-mails need to be succinct. The reader must know quickly what the message is about. An immediate tool is using the subject line to specify any action needed or not needed. It also should have a timeline on when the action must be completed. A follow up phone call may also be necessary. I always change the subject line on communication string if the subject has moved to a different direction.

Finally, try and keep an email to just one topic. Many people do not read emails all the way through. Having just one topic instead of several will help ensure the message will be read, understood and acted upon.

Follow these recommendations and your message will not get lost.

At a recent presentation I noticed some folks in the audience who appeared to lack any emotions as they usually are revealed from facial expressions and body language. A colleague even asked, “Don’t they look like card board cutouts?” Being engaged, whether in a meeting or in an audience, is a critical element of leadership presence.

Don’t be the folks who:

– Maintain a poker face

– Stiffly cross their arms

– Constantly look around the room and never at the presenter

Instead, be the folks who:

– Show they are listening by the engaging their eyes

– Move their body toward the presenter

– Ask questions when appropriate

– Validate the speaker by providing positive comments

I am always pleasantly surprised by great customer service. Great customer service is when you as the consumer are respected and the issue is solved immediately and with ease. Recently, I ordered a product from Amazon and it was missing some parts.

I went to the issues and returns section of Amazon’s website and chose to have a chat about it. I confess I was thinking they would give me a problem.The customer service person gave his name and handled the problem immediately with no indication that he felt I was not being truthful. Amazon also sent a script of the discussion for my records!

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if a key element of everyone’s professionalism was that we treat everyone as a number our one customer and client?We listen to the issue and refrain from being critical or defensive while solving the problem to the customer’s satisfaction, just like the folks at Amazon, Costco or Nordstrom. If we all did this, each of us would truly be considered a five star professional.

A recent article in the New York Times featured Brandee Parker who was once head of marketing for Facebook. In the piece, Ms. Parker talks about the time she and a colleague brought a black suit for her boss, Mark Zuckerberg, to wear on his first trip to Davos, Switzerland, for the annual meeting of the World Economic Forum. They thought that the occasion called for more than Zuckerberg wearing his usual hooded sweatshirt.

Mark never wore the suit. Instead, he put on his Patagonia sweatshirt. (And we are all not Mark Zuckerberg or a CEO of a Fortune 100 company.)

However, I agree wholeheartedly with Brandee.

This does not mean that if I like to wear leggings and an oversized sweater that those clothing choices are appropriate in a business setting. There are many choices today. In fact, a nice pair of slacks and jacket can provide the same comfortable feeling as a sweatshirt.

When I have garnered the respect capital then maybe the leggings will be appropriate. (I saw that Sheryl Sandberg wore them stage for a presentation showcased on the TV show, 60 Minutes. She certainly has the respect capital.) Also, I have learned if my clothing does not feel comfortable and keep me true to myself, then I think twice before moving ahead. I give the same advice to my clients.

Choosing the right venue absolutely shows the person on the receiving end you want make this a special event and that it is about them.

Here are some guidelines to help you pick the right time and event:

– Lunch is best when you have a limited time and it’s a simple thank you gesture or the beginning of a business relationship.

– Dinner should be for those who have gone out of their way to help you develop business. It should be a special venue (cuisine and entertainment).

Some folks love long dinners and an event. For others it is about their favorite foods.

– If an event is important, do the research to select the appropriate play, game or concert.

Following these guidelines will always make the happening a personal one.

A true professional tips those who provide good service, especially in the situations that are repeated. My rule of thumb is as follows:

20% for dining and personal services and at least two to three dollars for the car service and the airport baggage handler.

During the holidays, the tip should be the amount of one service charge. For example, if your manicurist charges $20 dollars then the tip should be $20. These are the folks who make your life easier and tipping is great way to show your appreciation for what they do.

Holiday parties are the time to celebrate relationships and a good time to take the stress out of this busy time of the year.

To ensure you have fun:

• RSVP at least a week in advance unless otherwise specified in the invite.

• Let the hostess know if you have any food or animal allergies.

• Make sure that a hostess gift does not get too close to food that needs to be served or too near flowers on the table.

• Arrive no later than ten minutes after the start time.

• Mingle and introduce yourself to new folks.

The holiday is a good time to say thank you to those folks who continue to help your business or career.

To ensure you give the appropriate thanks, here are some guidelines:

• Lunch or dinner is difficult during this time of the year – however you can send an invite for the New Year using a lovely note or holiday card.

• Theatre or sport tickets are great for those who are avid fans of either. Providing transportation makes the event even more special.

• A coffee table book of a favorite city, sports or autos is a nice touch assuming you know their interest in those topics. (I have client who is a car buff so his favorite books are about automobiles.)

• Food is always a nice gift especially when you know the recipient is health conscious and you acknowledge that with the food you send.

Some folks have a natural smile and it comes easily. Then, there are folks like yours truly who needs to be made aware of smiling. You can pretty much tell by my eye and head movements that I am engaged. But for many, it’s the facial expressions that reveal all.

Today, we had a situation where one person kept pushing on a subject and other person responded that the topic was not negotiable. At first, the dialog was conversational. It turned when senior person’s dead pan facial expression and stiffness in the body language became visible.

The other person kept the subject alive until the senior person said, “Note my facial expression and body language. You should be aware that you are not reading my message.”

The other facial expression is the poker face. Most folks perceive this means that the person does not want to be engaged and/or is bored.

The key to successful engagement is based on what your eyes and facial expressions say.