Anna Soo Wildermuth

Welcome to Personal Images, Inc.!

Here I'll give you up to date tips on developing your personal and professional image to ensure your first impression will be your best impression. Also I will blog about current image and communication blunders. Feel free to join the discussion by leaving comments, and stay updated by subscribing to the RSS feed. Thanks for visiting my blog. – Anna

Change One Thing is a superb book that gives excellent advice to help jumpstart your engine." Stephen R. Covey, author, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

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Archive: Behaviors

Sense of gratification – when we hit the mark by taking steps

targetHitting the mark is the moment when what you have accomplished the task. It can be engaging the audience and seeing they understand your point. It can be as simple as getting a smile back when you have smiled. The point is to remember that sense of gratification when things don’t hit the mark. It will keep you going to reach that mark.

I work with many clients where I get that sense of gratification in our partnership when they get to a point where they see what needs to be done and embrace it. So many times we tend to look at the missteps as setbacks as instead of steps to get where we need to go. It is all a process. This is why I feel strongly about it. Keep that sense of gratification when you hit the mark of achievement and remember sometimes, it takes steps.

 

Death stare

kristen-stewartHave you known folks who have the death stare? It’s when someone stares at another with a look that makes you want to shrink down in their seat in terror. (Examples are actors, Kristen Stewart and Sir Patrick Stewart.)  A death stare is different than a poker face. It is more about the eyes that go right through you. Check it out with your friends; ask them what your eyes say. The death stare  has more impact than any words. Use it wisely. (Doris Day never had a death stare while Joan Crawford did.)

The confidence challenge

Key to Leadership“Don’t be afraid to go for positions, jobs or take on clients just outside of your knowledge base. Confidence is overrated. It is when we most uncomfortable and looking for answers that we learn and grow the most.” Barbara Corocoran

Confidence is built by doing. The more you practice, the better you will get. I recently worked with a young, very smart CPA who practiced a presentation about the nuances of cultural differences between English speaking and non-English speaking folks. This also happened to be her first time speaking to a client group.

She did the hard work by practicing with me then did a dry run in her office. Not only did she ended up hitting a home run with the client, the Senior Vice President has asked her to speak at a regional conference!

 

What are musical times?

alice-wonderland-rabbit-clockYou may have heard the expression “musical chairs”… well, I have a new one “musical times”. This refers to individuals who continually move times and days for appointments because their schedules constantly change. In addition, folks who do this, never seem to arrive at the designated appointment times anyway.

This is the number one career killer in my mind. Being on time is being respectful and professional. Years ago, I was coaching with a number of account managers. While waiting in the executive dining room for the client, the hostess said while the clients were always on time, it was the managers who were always late.

When you are late, it sends a message your time is more important than the person you are meeting. Recently, I worked with coaching client who was always on time for scheduled appointments. I let her know how impressive it was and that it showed true leadership skills. The client told me that her staff and boss complimented her on it also.

Being on time sends a message you are managing your time effectively which is a the sign of a true professional.

 

10 Common face-to-face networking mistake

handshake1. Not having several personal introductions

2. Not having an ice breaker to start the conversation

3. Not having a business card

4. Not mixing with more than one group (or staying too long in conversation with one group)

5. Not listening enough (non-stop talking)

6. Not asking how, when and why questions

7. Not having a good time (projecting a look that reflects stomach pain might be occurring)

8. Not smiling (instead, wearing a more a grim facial expression)

9. Not making eye contact or looking around the room more than at a conversation partner

10. Not having a crisp handshake

 

Take away the nots and you can be a star at networking. The process will also become more fun.

 

 

It is never too young to learn

jumping couple in field under cloudsOne of the perks of long term client relationships is that I sometimes end up working with members of client business teams and even with their family. Recently, I was asked to work with a young man who was a grandson of a client (I worked more than 15 years with my client and her staff.).

Andy is quite talented in writing stories and wonderful artist. However, he is shy, could not look people in the eyes, looked down and had a half-limp handshake. To draw Andy out, I first asked about his art. Then, I requested that he show me some of his written work on his I Pad. I also used a few improv exercises to help him have fun when speaking with confidence. I noticed that he loved his dogs so I suggested that he think about them when he gets nervous.

In the book, Outliers, Malcom Gladwell writes about folks like Andy who have talent at very young age, and who keep working and developing to eventually be quite successful. Now, Andy has a head start in being able to communicate about his work. I believe he will be a very successful writer.

Can you imagine an eleven year old writing nonfiction books using animals as characters? How special is that?

 

You are what you wear?

How many ti24mes have you run out for a short errand in a busy area while not wearing your best? Maybe you’ve got clothes on that are usually worn when cleaning a garage or washing a car? Of course, then, you always run in someone you know. This has happened to me and I have always regretted it.

Now, what I do if I am going to run out in not too great looking clothing is that I put at least a bit of color on my lips and make my hair presentable. I do not want to be mistaken for a bag lady. I figure that when they see my face then maybe my poor clothing choices won’t be noticed!

 

The look

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAEyes can say much more than words. A look can be absorbed even before the person speaks. Samantha, (There’s a picture of her in this blog.) has these amazing eyes that look right through you. She does not talk much but stares and barks when annoyed. Her eyes do all of the heavy lifting.

Capture your look by using the eyes to obtain the effect you desire like effective actors, politicians and business people do. Joy, disappointment, sadness, authenticity and dishonesty and most other emotions are first reflected in the eyes. A good way to learn about the eyes is by watching films, live theatre and television programs.

 

A sense of humor

Mouthyq2beRecently, I was involved in an incident that I considered embarrassing.

I take one on one training on how to use a Mac Air (going on 15 months, now). Because I’ve been a PC user for 25 plus years, it is a completely new way for me to work on a computer.

Technicians who work with me are really very patient. They never make me feel badly when they have to continually repeat answers. So, I thought it would be a nice gesture to bring a bottle of Apple Ice for my main trainer.

However, when he opened the drink, the soda fizzed all over the table, floor and chairs. Instead of being upset, he laughed and turned what I thought was a disaster into a comical situation. He even said it made his day so much better. How wonderful it is to have this sense of humor. It makes life’s little mishaps that much more tolerable and even, at times, more enjoyable.

 

How do we express passion?

voiceOften, a person is passionate about their work but may struggle to express that feeling in words. Clients who select me tend to be passionate about their work but want to be able to translate their passion verbally.

They are diligent, though, in writing what their work is about on paper and, at times, will even interview folks who champion them to help define their motivation.

This is not easy. It takes digging deep and using examples and stories and to explain why their work makes a difference. Step two is to practice by choosing and using impactful words that are easy to say. Bring clarity around the why, how and who. Clients that practice and practice then keep practicing become very capable at verbally expressing their passion.