I apologize if I sound like a broken record but from head to toe, the really coordinated folks have all the details of their appearance in order. The hair needs to be well groomed (long hair only works if it is well managed) and complemented by top quality, well maintained accessories; sleeves, jackets and bottom lengths all should lay nicely at the proper spot.

Often, the excuse for a disheveled appearance is a lack of time. However, if you make the time in the beginning when you purchase the items good habits will be there, too. You will then always look your stylish best.

In stressful times, when projects do not go smoothly, someone may get thrown under the bus. If you happen to be this person, here are some critical tips to ensure that it does not turn fatal:

1. Stay calm

2. Do not interrupt when being spoken to

3. Ask questions to get details to either deflect blame or fault the situation

4. Accept responsibility

5. Offer solutions to fix the problem or make sure it never happens again

When does too much skin show? Cleavage for women can be challenging as can tops that are too tight.

Men who wear an open shirt collar may have their chest hair show. Shirt sleeves that bunch up and cap sleeves on blouses that are cut too short on fleshy arms also show too much skin.

Here are some rules to help you ensure you are not showing too much skin:

For women:

– Cleavage: The rule of thumb for cleavage is to make sure your top starts no more than four inches from your chin.

– Arms: Sleeveless tops can be attractive if your arms are toned.

For men:

-For men who prefer not to wear a tee shirt, be conscious of chest hair

– Buttoned shirts should not have gaps. Otherwise too much skin may be revealed. Wear a shirt cut larger around the stomach.

A glimpse of skin is a good thing; too much is best left for private moments and on the weekends.

Sometimes, folks who tend to want the work they do to be perfect, say no too quickly. What happens then is that others stop asking them to take on special projects which, if taken, may help advance their careers.

You can say yes to reviewing the project; say you will think about it and get back to them. If you do turn it down, let them know that you still want to be considered for future projects. Keeping the communications flowing is the key to your career. Never give an instant no, say you will think about it.

In a perfect world, we would not have conflicts and would always along with each other. Unfortunately, there are still a few difficult people that we either try to win over or think we can change them. The reality is that folks are who they are.

So what happens when we try to deal with them? The folks who are successful have a laser focus on getting what communication goal they have, accomplished. Geoffrey Tumlin’s new book “Communicating,” offers these three tips in dealing with difficult people:

• Let go, focus on strategy and let difficult people be difficult.

• Keep your expectations low; remember that you are dealing with a painful person.

• Accomplish what you need to do quickly.

Another recommendation is to avoid the dance where they insult you, you ignore it and go on working. For example, if the person says that this is sloppy work. You can come back with: Sorry to have disappointed you; I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again.

Use these tips and you will be able to accomplish your goals with minimal bloodshed.

In the Chicago Tribune, Sunday, September 8th business section, Edward Trullman (Chairman of Tribeca Flashpoint Media Arts Academy in Chicago) wrote about five ways to make the most of Demo Day. Demo Day is when folks get to pitch for business funding to Venture capitalists.

The five ways can help ensure a participant will hit it out of the ball park when s/he makes a pitch. They are also exactly what we work on with clients who are either interviewing for the next position or seeking to sell a project.

1. Be short, sweet and grab the audience early – know your story.

2. One template does not fit all – you may have tell your story in different ways.

3. Don’t let the way you dress be a distraction – this also goes for hair and grooming. Leave the green nail polish for clubbing and guys, trim the beard. No reading glasses – purchase progressive ones.

4. Stay away from case studies. Start with results – leave the details for later discussion.

5. Name your supporters – In Tullman’s piece, he talks about naming investors. Familiarity is critical especially because the folks you are pitching to want to a way to connect with you. Everyone wants to play with a winner.

If you have a chance watch Shark Tank on Friday nights. You will see that the folks who get one or two of the sharks to invest embrace these points.

There are two purposes of an interview exit. One is to ensure that you leave on a good note and the second is to learn how you could strengthen your skills as you move forward.

You never want to be negative, even if the person responsible for the interview was. If the departure was not a positive one, do a mock interview in front of a mirror. Practice the answers to these questions:

– What you liked about your experience in this role

– What you would recommend to clarify and polish that role for the next person.

Being prepared for an exit interview will ensure you leave with your professionalism intact.

The CEO of Redfin, an online real estate site, was interviewed by Glenn Kelman for the Office Corner in Sunday’s August 25th NY Times business section. His thoughts were that if you stay true to yourself even if you are different, that will draw people to you.

Leaders today must prove themselves not only with their performance but their people skills. Being different is important but more critical is relating seamlessly to your audience. However, I have also worked with folks whose quirkiness in an industry that is not creative might work against them. It makes people nervous and not secure.

Your goal is to ensure your audience feels secure with you.

Often, we think honesty is a good thing. However, it is only good if it leads to a solution to the issue. Many times we want situations to improve but we can’t quite pinpoint why. Honesty can be effective if you follow these guidelines:

– The opinion is based on facts not emotions

– Is this fact a new one? If it has been discussed before – what is the purpose of sharing it again?

– If it is a retread issue – do you have a solution this time around?

To help hold these and other types of serious discussions, I highly recommend the book: Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High, Second Edition, Patterson and McMillan.

Telling your personal story is critical in establishing context to you as a brand. You want to craft it so it can be told in its entirety or in segments, depending on the audience. It needs to relevant for the purpose.

(Remember, that in all cases we are always being interviewed, whether formally or in conversation, for the next project or role we want.)

Below are three must-have personal story elements to address:

– What makes you the special sauce that everyone needs?

– What are three success stories that can validate and prove your case?

– Describe your brief history that brings to your story up-to-date.

Write the answer to these three points on paper. Continue to edit them until they become a sharp snapshot of your personal story. Then practice out loud until it sounds authentic.

The last and most important step is to videotape yourself. Videotaping is the most critical piece because it enables you to see how others view you—how you look, sound and act. This is what your audience will experience.

The best story engages the audience and is told in less than five minutes.