Holiday parties can be landmines for careers sometimes even resulting in party situations being taken to senior leaders. On the other hand, holiday work gatherings can enhance your employment capital by giving others an opportunity to know you even if it is only to say hello and introduce yourself.

Definitely stay away from controversial subjects like politics, money and religion. Many relationships rupture because of differences in these areas.  Holiday parties can also be events where you can begin to mend some broken fences.

Today, most of our networking seems to be done via social media. This is due to a lack of time and the ease of posting on the web. However, nothing beats face to face events.

Companies are beginning to see the value in the face to face and try to get their folks to at least some events a year. For those have not been networking recently, here are some tips to remember:

1. Have a plan – Know who is attending and what success would look like after attending the event
2. Prepare a personal introduction including who you are, what you do and the benefits you bring customers
3. Bring plenty of business cards
4. Plan an ice breaker – an easy way to start a conversation – sports, movies or talk about a place you would like to know more about
5. Have fun
6. Bring a partner – a wing person – and take turns starting the conversation
7. Continue the relationship with those you like by following up soon after the event.

At a recent family event, several members sported political badges of the two opposing party nominees. It caused spirited conversations but many uncomfortable moments. This event was supposed to celebrate a milestone event bringing two families together!

A recent NYT article talks about folks going to therapists because of the presidential campaign. Folks are worried and anxious about this election. While I understand we all have the right to express our viewpoints, it would be nice to attend a joyous occasion and leave the politics at home. Remember the long standing etiquette rule: Never discuss politics or religion at an event!

I have been having issues with my Mac Air since updating the operating system. At a recent session, while I tried to determine why my logins were not working, the Apple associate helping me was new. He tried several options and they did not work. Instead of trying more options he went to his boss and they thought I should go back to the technical person I use.

He could tell this bothered me so he went to another associate and asked him to lend a hand. Sure enough, this other associate solved the problem for me! What I found amazing is that this young associate was willing to go the extra mile to help me out. He did not just quit. He also learned from the more seasoned person how to fix my problem. A win-win if there ever was one!

In a recent Tony Robbins blog post, he talks about dealing with fears by dancing with rather than ignoring them. This resonated with me but how was I supposed to actually dance with fears? I used them to motivate me to prepare for whatever I am facing. For example, when getting ready for an event that not in my comfort zone, I make sure no stone goes unturned to ensure that in that particular situation, I am well prepared. This gives me the confidence to dance with my fears.me but how was I supposed to actually dance with fears? I used them to motivate me to prepare for whatever I am facing. For example, when getting ready for an event that not in my comfort zone, I make sure no stone goes unturned to ensure that in that particular situation, I am well prepared. This gives me the confidence to dance with my fears.

There is never a bad time in your work environment to discreetly and judiciously project an image above your pay grade. But a particularly good time is when you are called upon to make an appearance before your most senior executives or Board of Directors. On these occasions, you must not underestimate the importance of body language. Your posture and engagement with that group must project the message that you belong at that table. Listen attentively so that you are sure of not only what has been said, but also what has been meant. Think carefully about what you are going to say and how you say it. Words matter, especially if you are careful not to use more than you need. And of course, give whatever assignments from that encounter that come your way your highest priority. In many companies, there is an executive pattern of behavior that is just a shade more refined than what most of us experience on a day-to-day basis. Think about how you can become comfortable with that behavior.

An apology for a transgression in a business situation can be a complicated thing, and it is so organically linked to the context that generalized protocols can be treacherous. Let’s start with this one: you aren’t ready to make an apology until you really mean it. The person to whom you are apologizing will have an acute ability to sense whether you are just going through the motions or are sincere. That person will also know if your transgression is a one-off, or whether it fits a pattern. If the latter, you will have much more work to do. And people can always tell whether you are apologizing for your deed, or only for having been caught. Many missteps are possible when making an apology. On the other hand, if you do it thoughtfully and meaningfully, you may do more than repair the damage – you may strengthen an important collegial bond.

A common courtesy is accepting or not accepting an invitation. However, this little nicety appears to have gone by the wayside. Is not responding a response? It is not. When is the appropriate time frame to respond? As soon you know if you are able to attend or not, respond so you don’t forget it.
If there is a respond-by date, use that as a guideline to answer the invitation. Responding to an invitation is being respectful to the party throwers. If you don’t know whether you can attend, at least let them know you received the invitation.

Good people get worn away when working for a bad company as in the story below.

As a business owner, I know that having good credit is very important for many reasons. For example, using automatic payment ensures I am never late for a payment. A company I did business with changed credit card companies making it necessary to call all the vendors to replace the card. This firm experiences many problems with their systems. They are trying to mitigate that by hiring good customer service people. However, no matter how good or how new, a customer service staff can only stay positive when dealing with legitimate complaints. Not ones stemming from receiving a call from a company saying a payment was rejected because they did not have the credit card.

I spoke four times to different representatives about this very situation. They apologize because they have the new card in the system but are uncertain of the problem. You can hear their frustration (forget about mine!).  How can a company keep good people when the system works against them? How can the reps  keep a cheery voice and attitude when the problem keeps recurring? That’s what wears them out, I suspect.

Some folks possess a blind spot. They feel that no one else can do their job so they walk around entitled. Everyone is replaceable. They key is to ensure that your replacement helps you move to the next level of your career. At a recent networking event, the person next to me lamented that she was not advancing in her career. She claimed the reason was that only she could do her job. In continuing the conversation, it came up that she had not thought about getting others involved in learning her responsibilities to groom a possible successor.

This caused me to remember a conversation with a YMCA board member. I chaired a fundraiser that was the most successful in raising money. The first thing I did was bring in a successor to chair it the next year. I pass this advice along to all my executives: Real success is finding your replacement because it frees you up for consideration for the next leadership role.