We all know someone is always upset. They are constantly yelling or angry. They hold others responsible for problems that they- the chronically inflamed—have created.
Or, the person who lets everyone know that they are the only one who knows how to do something perfectly.
We cannot change them. But we do want to be sure we do not become one of them.
Be aware of the following triggers so you will not become one of the chronically inflamed:
• Raising your voice when talking to someone about a problem
• Looking for the fault in a situation that is not related to you
• Saying- I would of done it this way and it would have been perfect
Life is challenging. Unfortunately, it is all too easy to fall into the trap of being upset all the time and blaming everyone else. Instead, if we look at solutions for problems, we will avoid being one of the folks everyone calls chronically inflamed.
Leggings are settling into women’s wardrobes in very big way. They have even influenced how jeans and slacks legs are being cut—very narrow.
Ellen Warren of the Chicago Tribune recently posted photos of women on Michigan Avenue wearing leggings. However, some women cannot wear them.
So the question is- can one wear leggings as slacks for business casual? There are some leggings made with a heavy, thick cotton. When they are worn under a long tunic, they could possibly pass muster and be considered appropriate.
My philosophy, though, is that leggings belong as casual wear rather than business casual. So, save them for the weekend!
“A first impression is a self–filling prophecy.”
Malcolm Gladwell, author of the bestselling books, Blink and The Tipping Point, wrote this. It is so true. How many times have I witnessed the difference between a confident and a non-confident person entering a room? You can see the difference with the poor body language and lack of facial expression being displayed by the person lacking confidence.
Confident people can lead and motivate those around them. What is it that gives these people confidence?
Is it that new piece of clothing in the right color and fit that showcases you perfectly? Can it be as simple as a new haircut and style, a new piece of jewelry or reading a book that validates your work?
Many times it is a combination of possessing both a feel good and an authentic attitude.
Keeping track of your wins and learning from your mistakes is also critical.
I also say that if you own your confidence in an inclusive manner, the world will offer you so many opportunities that you cannot imagine.
Your purse or briefcase should never look too big or overstuffed. An over-stuffed bag is bulging at the seams. In today’s world, the person carrying the essentials only, looks like a person in control as opposed to being controlled by too much “stuff.”
Essential items include a cell phone or PDA (which serves as a phone, camera and calendar). Next are your grooming items like a comb, lipstick and face powder. You will also need a wallet for cash and cards. The last item for the brief case is a portfolio and maybe a laptop.
Keep it simple. Carry only what you need. Not only will it make life easier, you will appear to be more in control.
Choosing the right jacket for a man depends on several elements. First of all, it does not matter how tall or how short you are. Go for the right fit whether you wear a jacket in short, regular or tall sizes. Consider these tips:
• Jacket length: The back of the jacket should always cover your butt.
• Jacket shoulders: The shoulder should always end at the point of where your arms meet the shoulder. It does not matter if the shoulder is a relaxed or straight style jacket.
• Jacket lapels: The lapels are a matter of fashion style but the lapels should balance your chest size meaning if you have a wide chest portion wise chose a wider lapel.
If you use these tips when selecting a jacket– you will always look like you are wearing a custom fitted item.
The biggest challenge most folks face in the business world is protecting their professional brand. The most significant mistakes begin with being careless with their image. Here are the seven most common areas of neglect:
1. Lack of impact- Appearing nondescript because of poor facial expressions (lack of a warm smile)
2. Weak body language- Slouching which shows lack of confidence
3. Inappropriate clothing choices – Business casual does not mean beach wear.
4. Old fashion style shoes- Tips too round or square
5. Ragged cuticles and nails
6. Chipped nail polish for women
7. Dated hair style
Your professional brand must always appear current and appropriate for your industry. You never know whom you will meet at any given moment.
One of the biggest fashion challenges for women is selecting the right pair of shoes to complete a polished look to an ensemble.
Here are some tips:
• Wear a ballet flat with slim, hugging pants that end above the ankle
• Wear classic loafer pumps or smooth leather flats with trouser cuffed pants
• Wear boots or platforms with wide leg, loose pants.
When you pair the right shoe with these different style slacks, you will always look smart and fashionable. Check out zappos.com or Nordstrom.com to find the right shoe for you.
A presentation uniform is a set of clothing you wear only when speaking to a group.
This outfit must be in the best condition. It must also be able to relate to your audience. Here are a few tips to help guide you to make the appropriate clothing choices:
• Color- Check the color of the room so that the color you choose you will stand out and not blend into the background.
• Fit-Never too big, Not too tight
• Reveal-Never wear anything too revealing. That means no cleavage for women.
• Boldness- A tie should be distinctive but not so bold it becomes distracting.
• Appropriateness- Know what is appropriate for your group. Is a suit necessary if it is a formal presentation? Or will it be a jacket with a companion pair of slacks or skirt for an informational one?
Remember these simple tips and be remembered for your talk instead a fashion faux pas!
Whether it is your appearance, communications or behavior, dependability is a critical factor in how you are perceived. People begin to trust you when they can count on your consistency. This does not mean you cannot change they way you look or sound but the difference must be not too far astray from your core.
For example, many times people will comment when you change your appearance, whether it is an update or a complete hair style change. Usually the comments are positive. What gets us in trouble is when the alterations are not seamless to your brand, the industry culture or the environment.
In fact, there are many folks who have been successful in business because their image has not changed or become dated. An example of this is Apple’s, Steve Jobs. His black turtleneck or T has been the same for 20 plus years.
Do not become one of the bad examples of misguided brand or image changes. Dependable, image conscious communication and behavior is the strongest example of true professionalism and in developing personal relationships.
What is it we need to do earn a vote of confidence from our audience? It is how we look, sound or is it what we say? Do actions count or is it an emotional reaction that instills confidence?
Today, the time we spend with folks is very limited so each interaction must count. Stephen Covey says we must invest in relationships like a bank making deposits so when you need to withdraw funds are available.
How we talk and act on what we say consistently begins to build confidence with those we have relationships with in all areas of business and life. When we do this in every interaction, we will have the confidence of our audience 90% of the time.
