How many times have you been in meeting and notice that the person you are speaking with completely changes facial expression and body language? This signals that the person is not on the same page with you. What should you do if this happens?

Asking a question to reengage the person is critical. The question must have elements that will bring the person back to the conversation. Never intrusive always inclusive, and if appropriate, a why, how or what question. Pay attention to their facial expression and body language to make sure you are getting their attention. Wait for the answer.

How many times have you not been introduced when in a group? To overcome that and become visible is to introduce yourself. This helps the person who might have forgotten a name or two while simultaneously getting make you noticed. This is also how you become visible in a networking situation when meeting with new folks. Remember to add a smile before you even open your mouth, especially when riding on an elevator!

Recently in a class, the instructor said: I don’t mean to be so direct and abrupt in giving feedback but it is because I want to catch the moment when the correction is made. Well, as good as that sounds, if you are a seasoned professional or just starting out as a coach, mentor or instructor you will go a long way if you using inclusivity in your feedback. Instead of saying something like “It is definitely the wrong approach”, you might say: “A different approach might work like this…”

When you are demeaned, it erects a wall of defense and emotional turmoil gets in the way of what might be a learning experience. Years ago, I learned from a top producer who was quite mean while training me. Did I get it, I sure did. But the scars remain and whenever someone reminds me of her, I run in the opposite direction!

Having just been to a black tie affair, I saw women wearing dresses in street, tea and formal length. There were strapless tops and jackets worn with pants. Men have the luxury of wearing a tuxedo for the black tie event and a dark suit for the black tie optional. Dressing for black tie or black tie optional used to have different meanings for women but now, women have the freedom to wear almost anything that has an evening look to it whether it’s a dress or a dressy pants suit.

I think of three things when choosing the right black tie outfit: knowing what the event norm is, making sure the outfit is comfortable and preparing at least two choices for the event. This is so that if there is a temperature change, I am ready!

Do you ask yourself what you want to accomplish when you walk into a room? What is it you want the world to know about you? What first impression are you creating?

Often, when I ask one of these questions to a client I receive a puzzled look. For myself, I seek approachability combined with an “I am in charge” presence. It projects with a confident walk, a smile on my face and contemporary and understated dress that connects me to the world.

How about you?

Often, folks ask if they should get a custom suit or shirt made instead of buying off the rack. The reason is that they want clothing to fit their body shape perfectly. If you had an unlimited funds and the time to find the right custom clothier this can be done.

Recently a comment was made about Hillary Clinton’s clothing. Some say it is better than the colored pants suits (that looked like a rainbow of popsicles) she used to wear. This year, some say she looks like a CEO and others say the clothes appear too homemade. The real issue is probably her lack of time and the job of always being on stage everyday while on the campaign trail.

Also, Hilary wants to make sure it is not about her clothes, first, and secondly, her body type adds pounds in front of the camera. Most of her clothing has been tailored for her but it appears that she lacks the time to always get it right. My hope is that her go-to person for her “look” is taking notes and watching videos so the clothing gets adjusted to ensure it fits and moves right. Hillary’s preferences also count for a lot. My thought is that she wants to feel good 24 hours a day. Hillary has my vote in that she gets it right about 80% of the time.

Recently, I was asked why communication skills matter when you only have five minutes to meet with senior leaders to discuss a project. Quite frankly, when I was asked, I was taken aback. Five minutes is a long time— a lifetime in some arenas!

You want to make an impression that says I am the person you want  in your world. To do that, how you sound, look and speak is critical. Given that you look, dress and act the part, the next step is to determine what point you want to get across in your five minutes of exposure.

Consider something like this: “This project meets the needs of this research or… this project tells us what we need to do to move forward.”  Bring your best self to the table. When you can do this – it shows you are a leader.

• Look the part
• Be confident
• Know what you are going to say in one complete sentence. Then wait for a response

Number two is a lesson from an expert who should know better from the countless times I helped men and women pack for business and pleasure. When it came to packing for myself, my own advice took a trip to forgotten land! Bringing us to lesson two- remember the do’s and don’ts of packing.

Don’ts
Don’t pack with the idea that you will be attending similar events during the entire trip
Don’t pack for one-season weather
Don’t pack a wardrobe you have not tried on

Do’s
Do pack for multiple different events, whether they include hiking, dining at a five-star restaurant or eating at seaside café
Do pack for different temperatures, from the very cold, to the very warm and for precipitation, rain and possibly snow
Do pack only things you have recently tried on to ensure they fit
Do pack outfits and multiple colors that coordinate with each other

Do these things and you will not be traveling fashion disaster!

Recently, I was traveling on a combination of work and vacation time. Several parts of the trip went well. The travel itself was easy and many resources were available to help navigate between work and pleasure. However, when the weather did not cooperate it became challenging leading to lesson number one.

Lesson number one is to never make a decision in haste. For example, take my hasty haircut adventure. The weather plays tricks on my hair. It causes it to lose body resulting in a very flat and straight appearance. So, instead of investing more in products, like a Paul Mitchell Daily Body Boost, I went and got a haircut.

Never go to a salon thinking you will get lucky on a haircut! In my case, what was supposed to be a slight trim turned out as a very bad cut. It took my own hair stylist, who used her magic scissors, to make the cut work. Even with her skills, it will still take a few months, if I am lucky, to get my hair style back to normal. Sub-lesson one…never get an out-of-town haircut unless it’s from a stylist you know or received a reliable recommendation on.

Many companies go through changes which may mean laid off co-workers or staff with changed assignments which can leave long-term team members anxious. The best thing to do is to wish them well. Let them know how much you have enjoyed working together and if you are close to the person, give contact permission. Always maintain a positive dialog. Someday, it could be you who is affected by company changes.