Wouldn’t it be great if you aced every interview and every person you met liked you instantly? This thinking reminds of when I was in sales. We were told to picture 10 deals. Out of that there would be 2 deals you would always get and 2 you would never get.
However, if you focus on the 2 deals you got, it has a tendency to bring your best. In fact, when you focus on the good, you will have a better than average chance of getting 80% of the 6 deals you have left. So forget about the rejections, focus on the situations that work. It makes rejection a non-issue.
One of my favorite voice exercises to improve diction is to use the diction pencil. Take a clean pencil, hold it between your teeth — not biting on it, but keeping it at the very edge of the top and bottom front teeth. Read a paragraph twice. Then take the pencil out and read it again. This will help with the s, v, f, and th sounds.
Also, with and without the diction pencil, try these classic tongue twisters:
– Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers
– Sally sells seashells by the seashore.
– I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit, and on the slitted sheet I sit.
– The sixth sheep’s sixth sheep’s sick.
– Round and round the rugged rock the ragged rascal ran.
– Betty Botter bought a bit of bitter butter.
Practice these exercises once a day for a month and you will hear the difference in the clarity of your diction.
Recently, I was at Costco getting my tires replaced and the electricity in a one block radius went down. There was no indication from ComEd when the power would go back up. The registers could only take cash or check.
Within a heartbeat the employees began apologizing. They also offered bottled water and cookies to everyone. The cookies were the big ones in oatmeal/raisin, chocolate chip and toffee. Plus, you could have more than one!
I stayed for about an hour. When I left they were still giving out bottles of water and cookies. The tire folks called me back in about two hours when the power came back on. I was so impressed. They explained and apologized for the inconvenience even though they were not the problem. This is an example of the good customer service.
Now comes the bad. I was traveling for a client and had a 5:15 pm flight back to Chicago. The flight was delayed three times. However, we only found out each time were to board that the flight would be delayed. Finally, we began to board at 11 PM, waited 20 minutes only to be informed that the flight was cancelled.
No warnings or apologies were given. The airline personnel attitude was more like: Why you are bothering us with your presence? I was much more impressed by the passengers who (like myself) never got mad or raised their voices.
It was interesting going from very good customer treatment to bad and ugly in a matter of just a few days.
Last weeks’ Time magazine’s has Facebook’s COO, Sheryl Sandberg, on the cover. She is wearing a burgundy dress. The dress indicates femininity and burgundy is color of royalty and power (from the Power of Color by Dr. Morton.) Sheryl’s pose is one of low key strength.
The look is a critical element in a leader. It encompasses clothing, body language, eye contact and how people perceive you. Is it perfect all the time? No, but it must be consistent and people around you must get it. A signature visual is what will help you stand out among the crowd. It supports your body of work and constantly replenishes your confidence capital.
Often, when I am working with clients on their interviewing skills – it is their body language that negates their professional presence. The On-Line University staff writers have written a blog on this topic. It emphasizes how critical body language is in communications. It points out how perceptions are created: 82% with the eyes, 11%, ears, 7%, smell, taste and touch.
Go to http://www.onlineuniversities.com/body-language to view a graph and article that will give you tips on how to insure that those around you see you as a confident person and to comfirm that you mean what you say with your voice and body language.
Retailers are beginning to realize how important it is to offer alterations for women. Major stores like Neiman Marcus, Nordstrom and Saks understand this. Now, Talbots, Macy’s and Lord & Taylor have made it easier for women to get their sleeves and hems taken up or down. There is also a National Association of Tailors that can help you find a tailor in your area: http://www.ctda.com/find_a_tailor.htm.
I am always asked how much should be spent on alterations for items that need updating. The recommendation is that for one item, a maximum alterations amount is $50.00. Also, it should be an item you could not replace for 4 times the cost, in this case $200.00.
Recently, I took an older Dana Buchman jacket crafted in a beautiful blueberry color and fine wool material to my master tailor. She is going to take the cut down the shoulder. Typically, the shoulder is the last item I would encourage altering unless the price is right and you have a master tailor doing the work. Fit is so critical because it speaks loudly about your presence.
Jewelry styles change rapidly. This can cause classic pieces to appear a bit dated and matronly looking at times. However, fashion, business social and lifestyle trends are also so fast moving that I don’t recommend throwing anything out. Temporarily retiring the jewelry might make the most sense.
Balance and shape, referring to hair and clothing, dramatically impact accessory choices also. We have moved from the Dynasty look (big statement pieces) to the understated where people cannot tell you are even wearing any earrings.
Necklaces have moved from, big, shiny, even gaudy pieces to natural stones and delicate gold chains. My recommendation is to be very aware of the statement you want to make and enhance it with a contemporary look.
At the Academy Awards, many of the actresses wore full sequined gowns. Barbra Streisand and Halle Berry wore them. Adele even performed in one. Ms. Berry was the only one who looked slender. For Barbara and Adele it added weight to their appearance.
If you are shopping for a gown, you will notice that many of them contain various colored sequins. My suggestion is not to purchase one. A gown made of shiny or sequined material will only add pounds on you. Besides that, they are very heavy to wear.
If you want sparkle on your dress, look for those that feature sequin trim that’s around the neck or lightly woven through the grown. You want to focus on your face and not the extra pounds a dress might add to your appearance. You can always wear a sparkly necklace for glamour.